GWM iso LTR

Being a gay foreigner in deepest rural Japan is very difficult. Before I came to Japan, I already knew that Japanese culture generally isn't very accepting of homosexuality, and that there would be many challenges for me. And there are many challenges. Challenges such as my only coworker not being comfortable with me being gay. Challenges such as some of my students saying obvious and derogatory comments about gay people to me. (some of my students know and some don't) And of course, there are many challenges associated with the language barrier.

But despite these challenges, I have remained positive. I've bought books and maps to find gay bars. I've scoured the internet, yet I can not find a single gay person that lives within 30 minutes of me in any direction.

The reason for this blog is that this weekend has been pretty tough for me in terms of this. To be perfectly honest, although I have a number of friends here, I am quite lonely for the companionship of a relationship. On Saturday night, I ended up going to a really romantic restaurant with two friends, and while they talked all night about their respective partners, I sat there alone. Then, last night, some of my friends wanted to go to the gay bar that I finally found in Nagoya and go to sometimes, but the bar master wouldn't let them come in because they were not gay, and it was really awkward for me. Now, I feel too awkward to go back there, which is bad because that was my one venue to meet people.

I know that neither of these incidents is a big deal, but for whatever reason, they made me feel really sad and epitomized all of the difficulties I've experienced here because of my sexuality. It just made me feel completely hopeless about ever meeting someone while I'm here, which is a long time.

I know that I'm being a little dramatic, and I've spent the past two department holiday parties on the singles couch, so I'm no stranger to being single.

I guess I just wish it were easier.